We teach our children from before the time they can speak how wonderful it will be when they are old enough to go to school. They may have an older sibling, neighbor, or relative that is already attending school, and most children look forward to the day when they, too, will be in school. But many times something happens that we may not even be aware of, and the next thing you know you have a child who does not want to return to school.
If your child tells you they do not want to go to school one morning they will usually say that they are sick. Saying they have a stomach ache or headache is the most common excuse. These are five steps to take if this should happen with your child.
- Stay calm. Validate their feelings and see if they will tell you more. When you have determined that they really are not ill contact the school and tell them your child will not be coming. By showing your child you believe them you will gain trust and be able to get to the bottom of the real problem.
- Ask them what will be happening at school today that they will now miss since they won’t be there. Try to determine if there is an event at school that they are attempting to avoid.
- Stay home with your child during the day, if that is possible, or have another adult stay with them. Talk to your child throughout the day to get them to open up to you about what is really bothering them.
- Call the school and ask to make an appointment with your child’s teacher.
- Talk with other family members and see if your child has said anything that might help you get to the root of what is bothering them.
Children feel very vulnerable in the complex world we now live in. Someone may have said something that upset them or they may be having internal feelings that they are not sure how to deal with at their young age. Be there for your child and they will gain the confidence and life skills necessary to maneuver through their life. How parents deal with things that occur when their children are young will have a great impact on everyones life as the child gets older.
